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I was not too sure how to write about this topic as I don’t really consider myself to be a writer by any stretch of the imagination, on the contrary. When you share in front of people it’s easier because you can read the expressions on their faces and their expressions are actually a fantastic guide as to whether you are on track or not. But this well this is just different.

Psalm 37 vs. 4 reads Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the Desires of your heart. (NIV).

This scripture has two elements one of action on our part and then a result/ giving from the Lord.

There is something that we have to do and the result of that action is a receiving of our desires from the Lord.

Matthew 6 says But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Mat 6 vs. 33 (KJV)

Again this is a two way street- there is something we should be doing in-order to receive from the Lord whatever our desire is (whether marriage, a job, a child, etc).

In this article I am writing about waiting for the right partner (Mr or Mrs Right).

What does it mean to delight in the Lord? How do you practically do this? And what are the results of this? Are they visible?

The two scriptures above clearly indicate that results of waiting on God are visible for all to see. When God adds to you he does not do it in secret, oh no!!!! he blesses in broad daylight for all to see and marvel (he likes to boast about us)

The dictionary defines Delight as something that gives great pleasure or enjoyment or a high degree of satisfaction or joy. My understanding is literally finding joy, great satisfaction in the Lord. How does this play out practically?

For me this is doing the work of the Lord. Get involved in ministry where ever you fellowship. It is living your life and not putting everything on hold until that person comes along… Live your life and your husband or wife will find you living it.

I sincerely believe that there is no one who is more attractive than a person who has a vision, who has things they are passionate about, who has goals and sets about achieving them. Why is this important because a healthy relationship and certainly strong marriages are between 2 whole individuals who come together to add value to each other –Proverbs 27 vs. 17- As iron sharpens iron so one man sharpens another. Please don’t get me wrong I am not talking about perfection BUT I am talking about an individual who knows who their identity. Who is comfortable in their skin a person who knows who they are in Christ.

I was at mid week service this week and the Pastor was teaching about how the Israelites where clueless about their great numbers and the fear the Egyptians had when they saw that the Israelites where growing in number. Had they known they would not have endured all those years of slavery.They would have stood up to those who had enslaved them. And so it is with us- if we don’t get our identity in Christ – you know it does not matter how great the guy is or the girl they will never meet those deep needs we have. And constantly we are saying to this person “ please define me, I am nothing without you, you make me whole”. That is rubbish!!! and a burden no one should have to carry for anyone. So we can’t look to someone to define who we are. This is the Lords function and we can only know more of who we truly are by spending time in God’s word and discovering that our self worth, significance and security are a 100% in God and that in him we have everything. Revelation 1 vs. 6 says that he has made us Kings and Priests. So we are royalty with the spiritual authority of a King. Ecclesiastes 8 vs. 4 says where the word of a king is there is power and who can say to him what are you doing. Imagine that! But you can only discover this by spending time in the word, going to cell and church

And the bonus about doing God’s work is that you are surrounded by like minded people. People who share the same values as you do, so you are 100% guaranteed that you are going to meet a Christian. And if they are also serving in the ministry they will not be undercover brothers/sisters( Oh yes i know about such people- wolves in sheep skin) Serving in the house of God is a privilege whether it is set up, sound, praise and worship, teas, ushering, cleaning up after service- whatever it is big or small – the Lord blesses so get stuck in

You see unequal yoking seems more and more attractive especially as you grow older( Amen Ladies!!!) because we look around at church and there is more of us then the brothers, or we think flip the good ones are all gone, or they are all younger than me!!! And that tall dark handsome guy you meet in the elevator every morning is now an option. And of course he will smile at you, tell you what you want to hear…

Then we go down a path that honestly is one way destruction….You tell yourself i will invite him to church, I will change him- No you won’t – He will change you and not for the better either , he will drag you down and before you know premarital sex, feelings of guilt, heart ache, depression sets in… Don’t do it… Matt 17 vs. 27 Jesus pulled a coin out of a fish! Seriously if he can do that he can create someone specifically for you and he will call him to where you are and he will find you…. and he/she will be a man/woman under authority

Marriage is a design only for earth. In heaven there will be no marriage (this is not me trying to comfort myself) Before God we are all individuals. When we stand before him as judge- he will judge us according to our works as an individual not as Mr and Mrs.

We all have our lanes to run and we must do so with joy as we do it unto the Lord. Paul is such a great example of this in 2 Timothy 4 vs. 7 (paraphrased) he says Guys I have fulfilled my purpose, done all that I was supposed to. I was faithful and now I am ready for my reward. He had no doubts whatsoever that he had fulfilled his purpose.

Paul was single and advocated for remaining single because from his perspective it’s easier to serve God as you don’t have to think about another person. He says this is first prize BUT he understood that we are relational beings and said don’t burn with passion…. get married but the right way to the right person

That is delighting ourselves in the Lord. We are doing our part of the deal ,what is the result…..

The second half of the verse says he will give us the desires of our hearts.

What is a desire? It’s a request /petition, it means to wish or long for something. For the longest time marriage was not a desire for me. I was keen on work, ambitions to climb the corporate ladder. People would say next to salvation, marriage is the next most important thing to pray about.

My thought process was I really can’t waste prayer on marriage there are more important things to take to God. I didn’t know what I wanted in a man. I tell you what i knew that after 4 years of working I wanted to be a company director and I achieved this in 3 years – that was my desire and God fulfilled it. My best friend when we were in Form 4 had a picture of her gown on her wall and what I would wear on her wedding day and she is married now with 2 girls, my younger sister always talked about getting married and having a family- she is now married with a daughter. See how God answers…

To be honest I don’t think I even knew how to pray for the right man and because of this I made some bad choices that left me hurt and required the Holy Spirit to come in and heal. As I have grown older I have learnt what is important when you are looking for someone to spend your life with. As I have spent time in the word and getting to know who I am in Christ, my eyes have been opened and I thank God that this has happened before I get married.

John 15vs 7 If you remain in me and my words remain in you ask whatever you wish and it will be given you. This is to my father glory that you may bear much fruit showing yourselves to be my disciples(NIV). AMAZING what a promise- there is no limitation to what we are able and can ask the father and it will be given provided (we are delighting, we are seeking, we are in him and his word in us). When you bear fruit this is evidence of blessing. When God blesses he does it publicly

What are your desires- write them down, make them plain so the herald may run with it- Habakkuk 2 vs. 2.

Speak them into being- Proverbs 18 vs. 21 says the tongue has the power of life and death. For many years I never spoke about marriage if anything I always said I am not going to get married, I could not see myself getting married I would say in conversation. I will have a child only. How foolish I was, I thank God for his grace and for opening my eyes to the transforming power of his word.

Our Father in heaven is one of detail we need to be specific with our desires. He is a specific God. The Old Testament is full of examples of how when he was giving instructions on what needed to be built or sown- he gave everything to very last detail.

Mark 10 vs. 23 say if anyone speaks to THIS mountain- not a mountain or some mountain but THIS mountain- and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen is done for him. Keep the faith don’t grow faint. Even if you don’t yet see the answers physically keep confessing and speaking the word of God in that situation and don’t doubt you will have the desires of your heart.

I am doing this and I know what my testimony shall be. God is not a man that he should lie and he is always looking out to perform his word. Our God is faithful

So while waiting serve God and he will add to you. I am and he is adding to me.

                                                                                             by Sapi Bachi (used with permission)