In 2010, I remember asking my flatmate if she thought I was depressed, and without missing a beat or hesitating she said, “Yes.” I was taken aback but somewhere within the recesses of my achy heart, I knew she was right. She then suggested that I go for counselling. Her earlier affirmation of my deep sadness…*ahem* …depression had rocked me, now her suggestion of ‘counselling’ just sounded ridiculous.
“Chipo M Chikara was a bubbly, vivacious girl! There was no way she needed counselling. She had just hit a little bump in the road of life, it didn’t require counselling. And besides, counselling was for crazy people! And I was not crazy…” These are a few of the thoughts that swirled through my mind.
Somehow, again, in the deep dark corners of my heart, I knew that something had to be done or else I was going to implode… So I went to the Counselling Centre. I’d come to the end of myself and had to tell myself, “You have to deal with this…you have to figure out what’s eating at you. No, you’re not crazy but this sadness is driving you crazy.”
I have to be honest and say that once I started the sessions, I hoped that they’d be like a magic wand and make everything PERFECT. That wasn’t the case. Instead, the sessions were onion-peeling times…
Yes, tears included! The times I spent with my counsellor were times where she listened to me, prayed with me and encouraged me. I wasn’t told what to do, how to behave … I wasn’t instructed… I was gently pushed to face my hurts and deal with them IF I wanted to…
And ALWAYS, ALWAYS reminded that only God can bring healing and comfort in time. The times were also times of discovery and revelation.. as layers were peeled back, things were revealed and I made more sense to myself.
I can’t say that I am 100% ‘over’ my so-called issues but I am definitely thankful for the in-roads that were made to healing my heart. And as with a physical scar healing takes time… I want to believe that I am on my way there.
I’ve also taken Journey To Wholeness twice. Again, through this course, more layers were peeled back. I was forced to take a serious look at myself and then ask God to help me through the process and further TRUST Him to work on me…
I know I am not done with the Counselling Centre; I’ll be back for more counselling, prayer encouragement or a third round of Journey To Wholeness. The women who are part of the Counselling Centre that I encountered i.e. my counsellor and JTW facilitator, were not there to tell me what to do or profess and project their ideas. The Lord gave me people who care, who are patient, who are great listeners and are prayer warriors through the Centre… each one is a conduit for His love, care, healing and comfort.
